Winnie's Way: April 18, 2007

Children are, more often than not, reflections of the parents who raise them. This becomes pretty obvious to experienced teachers. If the parent who teaches and disciplines the child is courteous and kind, the child’s behavior will show this. Conversely, if the parent is rude, crude and undisciplined, this will show, too. If the parent has a positive attitude toward learning, school, school subjects, the child will almost always respond. Thus, an actively interested parent is almost always a teacher’s best friend and ally.

Years ago I was visiting in a house when the children, just starting high school, came home grousing and complaining about the school and teachers. The mother responded derisively, “What do those teachers know anyway?” Not surprisingly, both kids dropped out of school.

When I taught, I watched the parents of non-achieving and misbehaving children, and gradually came to understand. The attitudes of the children were a reflection of the parent’s attitudes toward school, teachers, and the world in general. The parents were largely responsible for the attitudes and behaviors of the children.

When children were left to do as they pleased without discipline, they became little tyrants. When they were disciplined and had a parent who set a good example, they responded in kind.

Children of loving parents, who expected the best of the child, usually responded with the desire to please. Those children cooperated, did their lessons and were a delight to have in class.

I especially remember the father of one boy, “Sammy,” who had a disability. He had been in special classes to help him, but was slipping farther and farther behind his grade level.

Sammy was in my class part of each day without much success. Then his father contacted me on the phone and we talked about Sammy. I never did meet his dad personally, but we talked on the phone almost every week. Each week I made a list of the lessons we covered and sent it home with Sammy. His father saw to it that he did the work outlined for that week and handed it in.

At the end of the year the teacher who tested the “special” students reported to me that Sammy had grown 2.75 grade levels in that term. We were all delighted. I had a part in it, yes, but the real credit belonged to Sammy’s dad — an actively interested parent.